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10. Jarhead Sequels
Remember Jarhead? That mildly-received 2005 desert storm flick from American Beauty and now Bond-helmer Sam Mendes? Well, it got a sequel. Not one of them…but TWO sequels. Yep. Jarhead is a trilogy. And Jarhead 2: Field of Fire didn’t even come out until 2014, nearly a decade after the original. Jarhead 3: The Siege came out this year, and apparently only in Germany, China, and Sweden. Yikes
9. Horrible Bosses 2 / Hot Tub Time Machine 2
I just now realized that these two are, in fact, different films. Which one is more unnecessary? The first Horrible Bosses was a mild romp. A few laughs here and there, but instantly forgettable one no one had thought about until the sequel was announced. And Hot Tub Time Machine 2 comes in without its star John Cusack (probably the only way they could get the rest of the cast to return...Rumor has it that he’s a real butt-munch.
8. Dumb & Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd
Speaking of sequels without their leads, this sequel (prequel?) to the comedic classic Dumb & Dumber came out without the involvement of stars Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels. I guess the studio thought that a sequel to the 1994 hit would never happen, so lets just cash in while we still can, right? Cut to 2014…Dumb & Dumber To is released, making the prequel seem even more unnecessary. Both are horrible though. Don’t see them. They might ruin your childhood. Not kidding. Don’t do it.
7. Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo
“You know that horribly inappropriate and unfunny comedy starring that guy that no-one really likes and should probably never be the leading man in a comedy? How about we make a SEQUEL to that, but make it even more offensive and unfunny!” –former Sony exec who pitched this.
Roger Ebert’s review of European Gigolo sums it all up perfectly. “It’s aggressively bad, as if it wants to cause suffering to the audience.” You said it all, Rog...you said it all.
6. My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2
Surely this was only made because the first one was a surprise hit…FOURTEEN YEARS AGO. I can see it now…coming in 2029: Trainwreck 2, starring Amy Schumer! OK…the first one was, fine? But would anyone care fourteen years from now? The answer is no. There are four jokes in the trailer to MBFGW2 alluding to Greeks having a lot of body hair. Four body hair jokes in the trailer. I rest my case.
5. Home Alone Sequels
OK, so Home Alone 2: Lost in New York could be considered unnecessary, but it had charm, the original cast all returning, and of course the TalkBoy tape recorder. For some reason, they just kept making these. And the fourth one stars French Stewart. Keep getting them checks, French. And here’s an interesting fact. There’s a FIFTH Home Alone movie called The Holiday Heistthat came out in 2012. It’s ARGUABLY better than the original. Arguably.
4. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Jr.
Jim Carrey burst onto the comedic scene in the 1990s with his crazy outlandish character Ace Ventura. Well this sequel comes after the embarrassment that was When Nature Calls and follows Ace’s son’s hijinks. This probably came out in the height of Blockbuster mania and the studio was just hoping that the name recognition would sell some rentals here or there, right? Nope. 2009. FIFTEEN YEARS AFTER THE ORIGINAL. So…Saving Silverman 2 and Monkeybone 2 should be announced any day now.
3. Son of the Mask
This falls into the same category as our last “film” except now they have replaced Jim Carrey with Jamie Kennedy, who was the seventh lead in the Scream series and had a short-lived prank show on the WB. This one is almost so bad, its good. Its horrifically bad. It has a score of 2.2 on iMDB. By comparison…Baby Genuises and the Treasures of Egypt has a 4.3. Wow.
2. Jaws Sequels
Jaws was the first big summer movie. It re-defined how movies are made. It also set the trend for unnecessary sequels. Jaws 2 was universally panned as a cash-in and Jaws 3-D was a total gimmick. Surely they learned their lesson and quit making Jaws seq…NOPE. Jaws: The Revenge came and went, and made less than the $20 million cost of production. Spielberg must be so proud.
1. Now You See Me 3
It’s happening. And it’s literally the only movie more unnecessary than Now You See Me 2. Here’s hoping there’s a trilogy of prequels! How did J. Daniel Atlas meet Merrick? Why was Isla Fisher’s character so catty? Where does the carousel lead? SO MANY QUESTIONS!!!!
By: Kent Garrison